1. Eat too much and gain a few pounds — just enough to make my muffin top demand my attention. Ignore this for a while.
2. Find myself wanting to run or exercise. Shove that thought down with a donut.
3. Decide that I’m going to start working out again. Grab my calendar to find some free time. Realize that I have NO free time and freak out (possibly with a donut).
4. Gain 1 more pound. Get angry at myself and decide that I will start on Saturday.
5. On Saturday, put on my workout clothes and then get distracted by the dust on my nightstand. Clean nightstand.
6. Workout once and post a picture on Facebook. And Instagram.
7. Get busy for 2 weeks.
8. Work out 2 days in a row and strut around the house like a sexy beast.
9. Exercise on and off for a month and watch my muffin top shrink. Strut around some more.
10. Get busy for 6 months and gain 5 pounds.
11. Rinse and repeat.