I’ve always been a bit of an odd duck when it comes to relationships.
I was that kid who when I had a best friend, I’d get really bent out of shape if my friend had another best friend. I figured that they must not like me as much as I liked them. Since normal people have more than one friend, I had to figure out how to get over that.
Yeah, I spent a lot of time with my head buried in books.
Once I hit high school, I ended up with this super awesome circle of friends. We basically did everything together and spent most weekends in giant group sleepovers. However, like a lot of people’s high school relationships, the friendships just kind of fizzled out when I went off to college.
Now that I’m a grown up, I’ve finally figured it out. I got rid of those people who just complain and breed bad energy and I surround myself with the kinds of friends who are awesome, positive people. The type of friends who when you spend time with them it rejuvenates you and makes you happy. It’s a small, but mighty crew of people I know I can count on.
The problem comes when I have to travel outside of my little bubble.
Every year when I go to BlogHer, I look forward to the conference from the moment I purchase my ticket. These are MY people. A bunch of awesome lady bloggers who do what I do. But different. And I get super excited and super hyped. I plan my days and my parties and my meetings. And my outfits, of course. There may be some highlighters coming out because I just full-on embrace my Type A nerd self.
And then I get there and I have no friends.
Sure, I can sit down next to someone at a keynote or in a classroom and have a 5 minute polite conversation without being too weird. But then, when it’s time to switch activities we always part ways. And it’s not that I’m shy. I’m actually not. I’m what is considered an extroverted introvert.
At the end of the day I go back to my hotel room to recharge and I start thinking about venturing out for dinner and I realize that I’m kind of lonely. And it sucks and to be completely frank, it kind of hurts my feelings too that nobody wants to be friends with me.
But here is the thing; I KNOW that there are a bunch of other women sitting in their hotel rooms feeling the EXACT SAME THING. There are more odd ducks out there – just like me – and I’m not quite sure how to find them.
Although, right now I’m imagining trotting through the hallways with a duck call kazoo like the Pied Piper.
I guess the point of this is. I’m always going to be an odd duck. I’m 38 years old. I’m not going to grow out of it. This is just who I am. So, if you’re an odd duck too. Let’s be odd ducks together.
For my ladies at #BlogHer16 who get through the day of conferences and realize that you have nobody to get dinner with, find me. Tweet me. Facebook massage me. Quack at me. Whatever. Just let me know and we will meet up. Us odd ducks need to stick together.
For my fabulous readers not coming to BlogHer, are you an odd duck? Tell me about it!
18 thoughts on “Let’s be Odd Ducks Together”
Wish I was going cuz I would totally hang with you. Have all the fun!!
Awww, I totally miss my whole Chicago crew. That was the one year that I totally felt like I had a posse! =)
You’re not alone! I consider myself social, but sometimes when you get in big conferences like that it’s intimidating to just walk into someone’s conversation to introduce yourself. It makes me better knowing other people feel that way too.
Odd duck totally fits me. My husband and I often discuss why people don’t seem to like us. Truthfully, they like him, but he doesn’t really like to socialize. Whereas I am, well, an acquired taste; friendly, perhaps too helpful, a bit blunt, always hungry. I’ll be at the conference, too. I’m bringing a bit of a crew with me, but we’re happy to meet up. My sister is hugely likeable 😉
I’m always hungry too… Perhaps we will run into each other at the desserts!
I adore this and could have written it myself. This being my first BlogHer conference, the introvert part is a bit more pronounced than usual. I’ll shoot you a message in the app, I’d love to have someone to have dinner with before or after the expo and start the conference off right.
Please do! Or feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
I’m definitely an odd duck! I think I would really enjoy spending time in your company, I’m not attending BlogHer16, but maybe I’ll gather my courage for an event like that next year!
ohhh gosh you describe exactly what I feel would happen if I went to a blog conference and a big reason why I haven’t gone! Except that I am shy!! I hope you have fun at the conference though and that lots of people message you!
I’m an occasional blogger, not going to BlogHer, but that’s *exactly* how I feel every time I go to a conference. Occasionally I luck into finding another odd duck and it’s great. I’m also a giant bookworm who has always had just a few close friends with a slightly bigger circle in high school.
I 100% feel the same way. Unfortunately I’m not attending BlogHer, but I just attended Blogger Bash and what you described was me to a T. Hopefully you can connect with some other women who feel the same way!
I attended one blog conference a few years ago, and being naturally shy, especially in settings with big crowds of strangers, I did get that ‘alone’ feeling. It’s weird–it’s like I like all the people and want to get to know them, but unless I happen to stumble in someone who’s naturally really outgoing and just kind of takes me with them, I’ll gravitate toward standing near the safety of the wall by myself. haha! It’s always an area of growth for me!
I totally felt like that BLOGFEST last weekend. But I just take the time to get tons of work, goal setting and planning done. I have very good friends at home and so I use it as kind of a retreat. I LOVE that you are putting yourself out there and I would answer your KAZOO call for sure!
I love this! Embracing yourself the way you are is what it’s all about, and also you are not an odd duck, you are just you, which is awesome. 🙂
I’m attending BlogHer ’16 and I am so excited. I’m bringing along my best friend, our sons and her daughter. I am so excited to introduce her to this fab world of blogging that occupies so much of my time. My first blogging conference was a couple of years ago and I felt so out of place. 2nd and 3rd conferences were MUCH better and now here we are BlogHer Bound!!! Woohoo!!! Embracing your extrovert introvertedness and hope to connect with you in L.A. I’ll be at the Registration Desk bright and early Friday morning.
Joules, I too am an extroverted introvert, and at 57, and a died in the wool odd duck. I got to meet you briefly at BlogHer. It’s funny how when you are feeling lonely or shy, it always seems like everyone else has their stuff together, feels totally confident, has a million friends, two bazillion readers, and knows exactly what to do and say. Instead, we usually all feel awkward inside. One thing I learned this year – reach out, as you did above, and you’ll find lots of fellow odd ducks, happy that someone took the leap to bring everyone together. I hope to see you again at BlogHer17. In the meantime – are you open to sharing the reading you did at the VOTY event? I missed it and would love to read it. Thank you.
Thank you so much and I’m so glad we had a chance to meet at this year’s event! You can find my VOTY piece here: http://www.pocketfulofjoules.com/want/