Adding a Little Sweet to my Bitter

Today is my last day at my job.

I’ve worked at this firm for almost exactly 6 years and have had many ups and downs over the years.

When I started, this felt like a whole different company. We were in a crappy old building with a small parking lot, mini golf green carpets and a shared office for both me and my marketing coordinator.

There was no marketing plan at all for me to work from, I was simply told to “look at the budget” to determine what the company usually did. However, the budget was one excel spreadsheet with random words/companies and amounts on it – not really much guidance at all. My marketing coordinator was nice to me at first, but then decided that she resented me for being her boss and started spreading rumors trashing me to everyone she could.

After a couple years of hard work, the marketing department finally started working like a well-oiled machine. I’d introduced an annual marketing plan and budget, which provided guidance for our department. Each year after, we added more and more tasks to the plan. The partner-in-charge of my department was able to become more ‘hands off’ as I took over more responsibility.

We moved into a new building – a much nicer place with an attached parking garage that made rainy and snowy days so much more tolerable. Of course, I still ended up in one of the worst offices in the place since marketing is the bastard stepchild of the firm’s industry. I was okay with that though (pretty much) because at least I had my own office.

Not long after that, the marketing coordinator left her position and I was able to interview and hire someone who would be a better fit. I really lucked out too; I ended up hiring Jessie, someone who is now one of my closest friends. For the past 3 ½ years, she has been a total ray of sunshine every single day and much of the reason that I’ve stayed at the company through my unhappiness.

I can’t even let myself think of the fact that I’m not going to see her face every day. I talk to her about everything and each day we have ongoing conversations through my open door. I’m going to stop typing about that now because I’m trying really hard not to cry.

Anyways, I’ve made a lot of really great friends at work over the years, but it seems like so many of them have moved on to other companies. I didn’t really realize how many people had left the firm over the years, until I started thinking back on all the friends I’ve had that faded away.

And now it’s my turn.

I figured I’d just quietly fade away, you know trying to “keep it classy” and all. Because as great as some of my time at this company has been, the last three months have been pretty terrible. I’ve survived it by trying to think ahead to the future and not dwell on the present awkwardness of continuing to work at a place that decided it doesn’t want me.

Earlier this week I sent an email out to my co-workers. Surprisingly, a bunch of people responded with their well wishes and even more stopped by to chat. I say surprisingly, because I feel like I’ve been treated like such a leper that I really didn’t expect anything.

This afternoon, I invited a few of my friends to join me for a casual lunch. I was surprised again, and flattered, when they presented me with a really sweet card and present celebrating my last day.

So, I’m happy.

I’m happy that I can finally walk away from this purgatory – the awkward time between the day I found out I was losing my job and the day I could actually leave.

I’m happy that I’ve made friends over the past 6 years, especially Jessie.

I’m happy that I’ve had dozens of people tell me what a great job I’ve done and that they’ll miss me.

And I’m happy that I can now look back at this job with some fond memories, instead of just bitterness of the way things turned out.

So, it is with pleasure I will do the last thing on my work to-do list: “Leave work and never come back!”

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