So yeah, I guess I could just leave this blog post blank and let the title do the talking for me… but if you know me at all, I need to tell you more about the total suck-age that I experienced.
I read a blogger’s review of the new Essie Gel Couture nail polish a couple months ago and it was SO overwhelmingly positive that I immediately added “BUY ESSIE GEL POLISH” to my ongoing Target list.
I love the look of pretty painted nails (especially dark colors, because apparently I’m secretly a goth), but it drives me crazy when they chip. I have no tolerance for chipping and typically go through the whole polish removal process as soon as I can. Which really makes me mad when I just did the whole polish applying process the day before. I’ve had a professional gel manicure a couple times for fancy events and LOVED how my nails looked pretty for almost two weeks.
So anyways, I figured that since the blogger loved the new polish I’d give it a try. On my next trip to Target I picked up the Essie Gel Couture in the color “Spiked with Style” for $11.49 and the Essie Gel Setter Top Coat for $9.99. The $22 commitment was a little steep, but I figured that if it took the place of a professional manicure and lasted the claimed 14 days it was worth it.
Spoiler alert: it was NOT worth it.
I did everything right: I used a base coat, applied two coats of color and then topped it all with the special top coat. My nails looked great and so shiny! It was early evening, so I lived life like normal and went to bed. The next morning, I got ready for work, drove there and worked a full day doing normal marketing-type stuff. No random rock climbing or ninja fighting at all.
Within 24 hours I had chipped 7 out of 10 nails:
SEVEN out of TEN nails within a day?! Where were these claims that it would last two weeks with no chips? The worst part is that I lost the receipt, so I can’t return this $22 worth of trash. I figure that the best I could do is to save you guys from wasting your money on it!
So I’m a little bitter. And I came up with a list of other stuff I could have spent that $22 on instead of this crappy nail polish:
- 4 Grande Caramel Macchiato’s from Starbucks
- 7 bags of candy corn
- 2 matinee tickets to a movie theater and a soda
- This mug
- 10 ½ gallons of gas
- An actual manicure that doesn’t suck